Today seemed like any other boring day. By saying that you’d guess that something was about to happen.
I was wandering about the house for the most part of the morning. I read some comics that I have read like 98 times before; all in the name of art and total time wasting. Mom decided not to cook so I drove her to the nearby shop to get a bowl of Ban Mee. Oooh, right before that I banged the telephone booth while reversing into the parking lot. There wasn’t any damage though (My car, at least. I didn’t really bother about the phone booth).
With our bellies filled, my mom and I headed back home. By now I’m sure anyone who’s reading this is yawning already. Well you can actually stop here and go surf something else like …. I don’t know, stuff. Anyway, when I arrived I saw my dad all drenched in sweat as he cleaned up the front porch. Yeah, for those of you who’ve stopped by my humble little terrace house I’m sure you’ll understand what a workout the Tan Family’s Porch Cleaning can be. My dad was tackling the unimaginable task. So, I was empathetic and decided to help clean up the house too! And what better place to start than my own room? Har Har.
I filled a small pale with water and dumped a dusty old rag into it. Then I headed upstairs to start my role as Cinderella. Since a huge part of the room was not-so-in-a-mess, (notice the “not-so” part) my eyes traced around to detect the Tsunami struck section of my room – the top of my wardrobe. Man it was an entire junkyard up there! Painstakingly, I scaled my way up to the top and started to remove the boxes and plastic bags and cardboards and koala bear toys and shoes and fake Monopoly cash and bags and trophies and bowls and books. Wouldn’t be surprised to find a freaking corpse up there! An inexperienced slave cleaner would without a doubt get lost in that horrid place.
My limbs and face started to get covered with cobwebs that made me sneeze. But whenever I was tempted to give up I thought about my dad who was in a similar situation as I, other than the fact that he was outside breathing fresh air and safe from being stuck in intertwining webs of death! I hate bugs.
So far so good.
I looked through the shit I got myself into and started arranging and dumping a whole load of stuff. Then a thought struck me. Might as well unpack my Singaporean packed merchandise, no? YES! So I did. I went downstairs and took up 2 boxes of letters and gifts. Naturally, of course, I started going through them. One of the highlights was the Naruto Chain that Wei Jian got me. I MISS MY KELASMATE!! I started to smile, occasionally laugh as emotions started to swirl. I was touched by their honest words, reading letter by letter and was-AAAAAAaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeee~~!!
Bugs, bugs, bugs! Tons of them! Some sort of lice I think; I wasn’t about to stick around for an up close and personal lets make out session, alright? They were wriggling about my fingers, the books, the boxes, the cement linings between the room tiles, my LETTERS! GOD DAMN YOU BUGS! YUCK! YUCK! I also said something else that sounded like YUCK. (Hint: it may have started with an “F”) Freakishly scary worm like things with legs, it was horrible! Horrendous! Plain outright disgusting! Bloody hell I hate bugs!! Getting goose bumps was an understatement, believe me. DAMN YOU BUGS~!!! -- Black-And-White-Flashback-Moment --
A little tale that happened a long, long time ago when Kim was still a mere child:
There was a sudden power cut in the Tan’s residence. The blackout caused frenzy, the family members searched wildly for sources of light that would illuminate the darkened space that they were confined to. Their youngest son, Kim, with all his heroic efforts, suddenly felt a squishy sensation beneath his left foot. Fearing the worst, he hopped on his right towards the bathroom where a candle was lit. To his utter shock, he felt a similar sensation under his right foot just as he entered the dimly lit washroom. He finally managed to struggle through the ordeal. After taking a long and deep breath, he lowered the candle towards his tiny toes. At the bottom of both his feet, right there -- staring back at the innocent little adolescent, were pulps of mashed up cockroach juice that would haunt the child’s waking hours for all eternity………………
%^$#!!! Memories were supposed to be sweet, damnit! Not hair-raising-buggish nonsense! Gathering all the courage I could muster, I picked the lice -- a great many lice -- and dumped them into a gigantic bag, so as to be 100% sure that they won’t crawl back out into my room, my clothes, hair, ears and mouth.
That was just like ….. ew.
Ew.
Even blogging about it gives me a chill down the spine. The next time I clean up my room (or any space for that matter) I’m bringing a 5 litre Shieldtox Ultra-Fast-&-Strong-Uber-Go-To-Hell-Creepy-Crawlies bugspray with me. *Fuh.
Tomorrow better be a boring day.
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